About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
Most things are run by ingroup alpha males and everyone else is supposed to struggle for a place in the pecking order, fit in, and accept the situation without challenge. This causes mild to monstrous harm for everyone who isn’t an ingroup alpha male, and probably to the IAMs as well.
How has patriarchy hurt you?
Male but definitely not alpha and not entirely ingroup; so I’m expected to conform and my views aren’t usually taken into account. On the plus side, I mostly get left alone. (You don’t ask, but the not-asking has a very loud echo: yes, I am aware that this puts me in a comparatively very privileged situation.)
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
Not very much and not often, I hope. A fuller answer to your question demands a more complete understanding of my life history and my role in it than I can currently offer.
How would you define masculinity?
Masculinity is any social construct built loosely on the agreed or supposed connotations of biological maleness. Oddly in my experience this tends to favour individuals who are broadly compliant even if personally disaffected, unengaged with any political process, and willing cannon fodder for the phallic displays du jour of the ingroup alpha males.
Does misandry exist?
Thanks for the tiny box for this. Misandry is “dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against men (i.e. the male sex)”. So of course it exists here and there. Anyone who says it doesn’t may be expressing something that isn’t exactly a factual statement. Misandry isn’t a widespread, systematic, endemic, life-threatening problem comparable to misogyny, though, and I’ve rarely had occasion to worry about it.
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
What can a fish really tell you about the water in which they swim?
What best describes you?
None of the above
There are difficulties with every one of those descriptions, not least because they have all been used as a Trojan horse. Like Zaphod (not a role model) I am just this guy, you know?