About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
A system of ideology and power relations that enshrines male identification, male centredness, male domination, and venerates control and domination over others.
How has patriarchy hurt you?
It has made me almost entirely unable to express emotion in what I would consider a healthy way (“real men don’t cry” etc).
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
I have treated women I have been in relationships with fairly appallingly in the past, because of feelings of entitlement that I think patriarchy imbues all men with. Eg asking for sexual favours they might not have been comfortable with, generally being manipulative.
How would you define masculinity?
The ideal of behaviour that patriarchy says men must meet, which basically involves always being “strong” and in control of oneself and others, never showing emotion except for anger, valuing violence and domination as a way of solving problems, and denigrating anything deemed to be feminine.
Does misandry exist?
I have always felt more misandry from men than women. For example, men who hold that “boys will be boys” and deny that men can be responsible for themselves, whereas feminists in particular seem to view men as being capable of being better than patriarchy says they can be.
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
There are plenty of prejudices surrounding (straight, white, cisgender) men, but I don’t think these amount to the oppression that people outside that description face.
What best describes you?
An ally to feminism