About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
As a man I know that generally wherever I go I will be seen as “stong” “in charge” “logical” as a default. Furthermore other men are already in positions of power and authority and will favour my perceived maleness. As a result I will be playing life on “easy mode.”
How has patriarchy hurt you?
I can’t be who I want to be. I am expected to live up the weird male standard. Not just by men, but everyone. From emotional expression, to clothes, to media, any deviation is mocked, even by people who consider themselves liberal. I also feel that I am part of the problem, that my success, such as it is, was somehow gained unfairly. I know other people who have struggled to get where I am, while I have glided along, not really having to try very hard.
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
Constantly “mansplaining” everything. It’s a sickness, and I can barely help myself. Also I think that there is a feeling that you are not a man until you have had a string of meaningless one night stands. As a result I have a lot of regrets about my early relationships due to behaving like a git.
How would you define masculinity?
I don’t want to define myself or anyone just by gender. So defining masculinity is the same as defining Caucasianness, or blue-eyedness. We should all be able to exist socially and express ourselves to the extent that we don’t cause harm to others.
Does misandry exist?
If the question is “do some women hate men” then I assume that might well be true. If the question is “is there a centuries old system of repression designed to keep men down then if it does exist it has been a spectacular failure.
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
Only in a way that has advantaged me
What best describes you?