About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
The concept of a man being the leader or head of a household, business or organisation through some kind of innate superiority over an equally capable woman.
How has patriarchy hurt you?
It leads some women to believe that I am personally responsible for realities that I disagree with, and also can’t control. For example, it’s obvious to me that a man and woman doing the same job to a similar standard should receive the same pay. But I am made to feel responsible for the fact that this isn’t the case, even though I can do little about it except voice my opinion. To burden me with that guilt seems unreasonable.
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
I can’t think of an example of where I have. It would feel like I was discriminating against somebody, and I wouldn’t be comfortable with that.
How would you define masculinity?
That’s a tough one. I’d define it as a set of attributes associated with men. But then that’s because I’ve just looked it up on Wikipedia. That aside, the media would like us to think that it’s about muscles, fast cars, aftershave, drinking beer, having “banter” with “the lads”, football and 101 other cliches. I’d prefer to think of it as the concept of feeling positive about your own strengths as a man. My definition is subjective, which may be a weakness, but has the advantage that it doesn’t necessitate putting down the opinion of other people.
Does misandry exist?
Some radical feminist argument descends into misandry, and that does no favours to either men or women.
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
However only in ways that are , superficially, trivial. For example, it being assumed in restaurants that I made the booking rather than my girlfriend, or I would prefer to taste the wine rather than her. Small things that, on reflection, seem quite odd.
What best describes you?