About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
A set of values which are prevalent in our society, which seek to maintain male privilege by enforcing gender roles and punishing those who do not conform to them.
How has patriarchy hurt you?
The expectation that I should be the one who makes the first moves in a relationship really bugs me. Biphobia, in as much as it is simply another aspect of punishing those who stray from the expected gender norms, could also be considered to fall under this heading.
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
I have made the odd hurtful comment to women, about their appearance, which I frankly struggle to understand why I even said. I try quite hard not to make gendered assumptions, but I’m sure I make plenty.
How would you define masculinity?
I have no idea, really. Beyond an aesthetic concept of rugged manliness, I don’t think it has much value as a concept today.
Does misandry exist?
But most accusations of misandry are ludicrous. In a society where women face patriarchal oppression much more than we do, someone making generalisations about “men” whilst venting their frustration should not be seen as misandry. It is also worth saying that ingrained, subconscious misogyny is found in most people, even feminists, but the same is not true of misandry.
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
What best describes you?
I would call myself a male feminist. I believe allyship is something which should be determined by the group in question, not by me, so I don’t like that as a self-chosen label.