About the show: Dave Pickering takes us on a personal journey through gender as he tries to explain masculinity both to you and to himself. Part true storytelling, part TED talk and part apology, the show looks at how the patriarchy hurts men too; how the patriarchy has hurt him, and how he has hurt people because of patriarchy. Drawing on an anonymous survey of 1000 men, feminist theory, internet memes and his life experience, Dave will explain the conclusions he Read More ...
Does patriarchy exist?
How would you define patriarchy?
A system of constructs that keeps men in a dominant and privileged position.
How has patriarchy hurt you?
Yes. Gender can be a construct too. I might have a penis and I might be heterosexual, but that does not mean I am the “man” that culture defines. Often people/society project an image of “man” on me that does not fit me at all, and (for example) expect me to make fun of women and their capabilities (as a programmer, as a car driver, …). I am privileged because of my biological sex and sexual orientation. I am hurt when I am confronted with the consequences of that privilege. Strongly feeling people are all inherently equal, I strongly despise this kind of system. That said, I think the way patriarchy hurts me is nothing compared to the damage patriarchy does to women.
How have you hurt people in a way influenced by patriachy?
I could do more with my privileges: I could be an ally more often. And I have been ignorant too often – even if we consider ourselves as “trying to do what is ethically correct as much as we can”, we still need to inform ourselves. I’ve consumed porn, and this way supported the porn industry, which is a strong pillar of patriarchy in the west (abuse and objectification of women as part of the free market, to be “consumed”).
How would you define masculinity?
A set of constructs legitimizing itself by pointing to some biological aspects that are shared by around 50% of the population.
Does misandry exist?
All people are capable of hating others based on their skin/gender/…
Have you experienced gender and/or sex related prejudice?
I do not fit in the mold society expects me too, but many people still act as if I do or should do.
What best describes you?